1. Kiss the other person when you have morning breath. Men start doing it at the 5-month mark. Women wait 8 months.
2. Start being honest about your finances . . . 8 months for both.
3. Be okay with crying in front of them . . . 11 months for men, 5 months for women.
4. Pass gas openly while they're in the room . . . 9 months for both.
5. Be honest with them about their flaws instead of pretending everything they do is fine . . . 8 months for men, 1 year for women.
6. Stop dressing to impress them . . . 9 months for men, 1 year and 2 months for women.
7. Ask them to bring you toilet paper if it runs out . . . 8 months for guys, 1 year and 2 months for women. (Wait, what do people do otherwise? Not use toilet paper?)
8. Leave the bathroom door open when you go . . . 11 months for men, 1 year and 2 months for women.
9. Stay in the bathroom WITH them while they're using it . . . 1 year and 1 month for men, 1 year and 2 months for women.